i spent most of last night trying to hold on to a vivid dream.
but every time i woke up, another little piece was gone.
i'm not sure why i continue to believe i can hold on to these things. it's as if they don't belong to me. the universe rents them to me for five minutes a night and then destroys all the evidence - unless i can get to my laptop or notepad first.
which i rarely do.
all i remember now is having the most horrible feeling when Jules confessed his girlfriend Kim had overheard someone in her store ask aloud why i still bothered to come around; why i still bothered to sing and tell people i was still writing. why, when i was obviously no good.
did i already have a feeling those words were going to come out of his mouth? is that why we were having the conversation in the first place? i don't know.
all i know is i was devastated.
that much i remember.
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